Time flies. It speeds faster than you can catch up with. Before you realize, the year is almost coming to a draw. And a new year, with fresh hopes and new challenges to conquer, is patiently awaiting us, quietly looming closer and closer to us as the days go by.
I could still remember vividly the start of this year, the start of my sec 2 life. And now it’s rapidly coming to a close. Two more days and it’s officially the end of school term. Time really flies. Twelve months just seem so fast. I could still remember the time at the start of the year when school ended at 5. I could still remember the time when I stayed back until 7 for my intensive BB Adventure Quest training. I could still remember the time this year when I first attended my higher Chinese class after being promoted from normal Chinese to HCL. I could still remember the time when Lum, Kevin, Mu Yao and me went to Popular at Parkway after school to shop for new CDs at CD Rama.
It’s still swirling around in my mind, fresh and clear. I remember, and cherish dearly, those times.
Before I can even reflect on those memories, 2005 is coming to an end.
The closure of the school term brings me mixed feelings. Firstly, there is unwillingness. Then, there is hope. The hope of a new start as I close a chapter in my life and prepare to open another new one. A new and adventurous time of learning is going to start in my educational life.
I will be leaving next year, as all of you already know. Many of you may perceive that I leave VS willingly, happily, with no worries, feeling care-free and fortunate.
But to tell you guys the truth, I DO NOT LEAVE WITH A HAPPY HEART.
That’s absolutely right. I leave with a heavy heart. I leave unwillingly.
The main reason: I miss all my schoolmates. I really do. I can assure you that I really miss every single one of my classmates in 2E, and my BB friends, officers and teachers.
I value friendship. I believe in developing them, for they are life-long things worth investing time in. Friends are to be treasured dearly. Friendships are important, they are crucial and they are necessary to cultivate. Up to a certain extent, I can say that friendship means more than school work, or more specifically, our exam results. Don’t get me wrong. Yes, exam results are important too. School work is something which one must pay attention too. But friendships also deserve equal, if not more, importance in our lives. Exam results are a one-off thing. Think about it, when you are in sec 2, do you still really care about your sec 1 results, or your PSLE results?
No, you don’t. But its friendships that last. It is an everlasting thing that cannot be accomplished overnight. It requires effort, time, understanding and love for it to grow and sprout. We must deliberately make time for it. That is why I try to build friendship instead of hatred. There is no point in sowing discord among people. There is no gain at all. It only leaves one party hurt and lonely.
Friends are a must-have in one's life. Without friends, life is meaningless. Without friends, life is boring. Without friends, we will never experience true fellowship. If you do not have friends, then you definitely have not lived life to its fullest.
For the record, I shall name some people whom I am closer with:
- Mu Yao
- Andrew
- Wei Liang
- Weng Keong
- Jun Jie (Last time, although I earnestly hope that our friendship can once again resume. )
- Han Hao
- Kevin
- Samuel
It may not occur so obviously to the mention names above, but I do take the initiative and effort to build relationships with these people. They may not realize it all these while, but unknowingly, I actually do try to develop my relationships with them.
What I mean by friendship is not the sort of superficial bonding between two people where we just talk to each other everyday, asking about each other, but it is about understanding more about their lives, getting to know them on a deeper level, appreciating their strengths and weaknesses, be a listening ear to their problems and difficulties and build up strong bonds which will stand the test of time.
I do place friendship up high on my priority list because it really is worth all the time and effort. Every single bit pays off. I hope these people above regard me as someone more than a friend, but more of a trustworthy companion who stick through thick and thin.
That’s why it’s only natural that I seriously miss all of my friends badly, very badly. At times when I’m alone and idol, like during my bus journey home, I will inevitably begin to think of all my friends, how fast the year has ended, how much have I did to develop these friendships, and mostly, how much I will miss them when I leave for VJ next year. All these pondering and reflecting brings to me an indescribable feeling of loneliness, and dejectedness, of sadness and I suddenly feel so gloomy and melancholic. It cannot be fully described with words. This intense feeling overwhelmes me. Even as I’m typing this very long post, I do so with a heavy heart, knowing that I’m going to part from my best friends, to leave for a separate, unknown path waiting to be discovered.
Despite all these, I give all my close friends my assurance that although I may have left VS physically, I will nevertheless not forget or forsake all my precious friendships cultivated in this past 2 memorable years. There’s still email, msn, sms, blog, and the phone to communicate with. My heart remains with my friends, forever.
Our lives are just so hectic, busy and packed. We do not have the time to fulfill all our aspirations and dreams. Sometimes, it is important to take a step back out of your rushed lives and stop, ponder, wonder, and reflect on what you have done so far. Yes, stop, and reflect.
Reflect.
What is it that you have done well this year? What are some areas which need improvement? What has life been? Have you reached your goals?
So stop, and think.
This is one aspect of life where most ignorant people miss and do not realize. Yet it is so very very vital to just come to a halt for a while, stop, and think. I can’t stress enough the importance of friendship and reflecting. It is a gauge to enable one to see how far they have walked in their lives.
Just take some time off, close your room door, and quietly, personally, think about what happened this year. Just regurgitate all the past moments and days, regardless if its joyful or not, and just ponder deep into it, think about it, relive it in your minds.
Life is not just all about work and play. One must pay equal attention to his emotional, spiritual, and social needs too.
What better way to do that than to reflect?
I would like to individually thank all my close friends for seeing me through this wonderful year, for caring for me, for helping me, and for sharing my joys and sorrows. Form the bottom of my heart, I sincerely take this opportunity to thank all of you. Thank you for your unending love that you have poured out on me.
Thank you.
So here it goes: Thank you Mu Yao, Andrew, Wei liang, Weng Keong, Jun Jie, Han Hao, Kevin and Samuel for making my stay in VS a pleasurable and meaningful one.
Two years in VS is not a short time, neither is it a long time, but I think it is sufficient for making new friends and for developing my character. BB has played a dominant role in instilling in me a sense of discipline, puntuality, self control, and self sacrifice. I would also want to thank my teachers for their invaluable guidance, support and encouragement.
These two years has been the best years of my life, really. How I wish I could relive these two years again. They are the “golden” period of my teenage years, where I grow the most (not just physically).
Before I leave for VIP, I would like to wish everyone their best in their studies and endeavors. I believe everyone had the potential to do well academically. It’s just up to you to realize your undiscovered potential, to make use of it and to maximize it to its fullest. Everyone is of equal caliber, including me. As long as you pay attention in class, do your assignments diligently, revise constantly, have a positive outlook towards school, you will SURELY succeed someday. You have my guarantee for that. This is the only secret “formula” to doing well. Hard work coupled with diligence. Intelligence only plays a minor part. Intelligence without hard work equates to nothing. In life, there will be ups and downs. When you do not do so well, do not be discouraged, but be more determined to do better the next try, learn from your flaws, improve on them and success will belong to you.
I will never forget you guys. I wish you all the best. Do VS proud. I am privilege to be able to make such good friends, and our friendship will continue to prosper, develop.
I do not return because I have not really left. Once a Victorian, always a Victorian, and I’m proud to be one. I will visit VS if time permits next year, most probably on Teachers' day. But for now, we have to leave to embark on a brand new journey full of excitement and hopes.
I bid a final thank you and goodbye to all my schoolmates. I will miss you people tremendously, terribly.
Nil Sine Labore
Ian
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Today's maths presentation
Put a lousy projector with a slow HP laptop. The projector which needs roughly 1 hour to cool down before switching it on after using. The machine with 480MB ram, 1.50 Intel Inside Pentium R processor, a 40GB harddisk and Service Pack 1. Running on XP Professional of course.
You get wonders. Brillant combination. Absolutely.
You get a computer which hangs all of a sudden during a Powerpoint presentation (PPT).
Well that's what happened to me today, when Samuel, Guo Wei and me went up to present our June Mathematics Learning Trip to Beijing to our dear sec 1 Victorians.
Unfortunate. And definitely damn malu.
All of a sudden when Guo Wei was presenting, the damn laptop decided to cock up. We didn't touch the mouse. We didn't touch the keyboard. We didn't even touch a single thing on the computer. And it just happened...like magic.
The PPT suddenly closed itself and a stupid MSN messenger window opened up. And it was signing in. I don't know if it was connected to the internet or what...but Mu Yao says there's probably wi-fi at the hall or something. Samuel said that it "picked" up some weak signals from the nearby hostel. What crap. Crappy crap. I dont believe their theories. I don't understand how the damn hell MSN could sign in when it isn't even connected to the internet. Simultaneously, another weird Windows Update window popped up from nowhere. I suppose that caused the PPT to lag...like crazy. We jammed the enter button and click the mouse so many times in a vain attempt to make the presentation play. But it just didn't budge.
Instead, the screen hanged and only the blue HP Invent wallpaper was displayed. Control alternate delete didn't work too, after a few desperate tries.
We had to resort to the shut down button. Only that budged. Thankfully, it shut down and restarted.
And the presentation continued.
Lesson learnt: switch to a mac.
Or should we not?
FYI, Microsoft Office for Mac totally SUCKS. I emphasize SUCKS.
It's totally different. There's no the "with previous" option, no motion path, no "exit" animations and there are a whole lot of different effects.
Result when you play a Microsoft Office PPT on a Microsoft Office for Mac: Total crap and junk. Totally frustrating.
So is a Mac always that good? Think twice, or the consequences may be dire.
Ian
You get wonders. Brillant combination. Absolutely.
You get a computer which hangs all of a sudden during a Powerpoint presentation (PPT).
Well that's what happened to me today, when Samuel, Guo Wei and me went up to present our June Mathematics Learning Trip to Beijing to our dear sec 1 Victorians.
Unfortunate. And definitely damn malu.
All of a sudden when Guo Wei was presenting, the damn laptop decided to cock up. We didn't touch the mouse. We didn't touch the keyboard. We didn't even touch a single thing on the computer. And it just happened...like magic.
The PPT suddenly closed itself and a stupid MSN messenger window opened up. And it was signing in. I don't know if it was connected to the internet or what...but Mu Yao says there's probably wi-fi at the hall or something. Samuel said that it "picked" up some weak signals from the nearby hostel. What crap. Crappy crap. I dont believe their theories. I don't understand how the damn hell MSN could sign in when it isn't even connected to the internet. Simultaneously, another weird Windows Update window popped up from nowhere. I suppose that caused the PPT to lag...like crazy. We jammed the enter button and click the mouse so many times in a vain attempt to make the presentation play. But it just didn't budge.
Instead, the screen hanged and only the blue HP Invent wallpaper was displayed. Control alternate delete didn't work too, after a few desperate tries.
We had to resort to the shut down button. Only that budged. Thankfully, it shut down and restarted.
And the presentation continued.
Lesson learnt: switch to a mac.
Or should we not?
FYI, Microsoft Office for Mac totally SUCKS. I emphasize SUCKS.
It's totally different. There's no the "with previous" option, no motion path, no "exit" animations and there are a whole lot of different effects.
Result when you play a Microsoft Office PPT on a Microsoft Office for Mac: Total crap and junk. Totally frustrating.
So is a Mac always that good? Think twice, or the consequences may be dire.
Ian
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
The post exam trauma
Ok so my exams are finally over. That's a great relief.
But with the end of it comes the start of something equally bad, if not worse.
It's none other than the terrifying results. Yup, that's another fear altogether. Trauma to be exact.
Though we all know that nothing can be done to the results as the exams are over, there's still this natural fear and anxiety inside us that constantly reminds us that the worst is yet to come. I try very hard not to think of the results that will haunt me but somehow I just cannot accomplish that. Everytime someone starts talking about my recent exams, this horrifying thought of me not performing up to standard penetrates my mind, and pokes itself so deeply that it causes me endless worries, leaving me questioning in vain what the hell would happen if I did badly.
Well...perhaps Ms Lim would comment on my report card writing: "Ian has slackened tremendously this term and he needs to buck up on his studies. "
Perhaps my grandparents would nod their head in dismay saying: "Ian, how come do so badly? Last time your papa exam that time will lock himself up in his room and study all day...he always get good results one...always top three in standard. How about you? Whole day play play play never study see lah now results so poor..."
Perhaps my parents would disappointingly remark: "Ai yoh what happen to your studies?! See lah...always so careless...later you don't do well VIP will reject you..."
Perhaps, perhaps, perhaphs. Maybe things will turn out like this. Or maybe not?
Or will my ever-understanding, caring and loving classmates (people like Andrew, Wei Liang, Mu Yao and so on) comfort me and assure me that I did rather well? Actually, as a matter of fact, they did.
Andrew said that I would not do so badly. Oh well I suppose he came to that conclusion just because I have been grabbing the first or third position in class from sec 1 to now. (For the record, I got 1st in class for sec 1 SA1 and SA2, and 3rd in class for sec 2 SA1. )
Ok ok I know what you are going to comment next: This stupid idoitic Ian has a damn freaking big ego leh...I know he clever lah, but don't need to hao lian (be proud in Chinese) and show off right?!
Relax friend, I'm not being a proud asshole or anything but it's just to prove that I have degraded from the first in sec 1 to third in sec 2. That's a bad thing. (Actually it's partly thanks to the cur who joined us this year and is supposedly smarter than me. )
Above all these burdens there's this constant "reminder" by my dear darling friends that I'm leaving for VJ next year. Maybe the word "reminder" is a big understatement. Neither can I call those "pleasant" comments jeers.
Perhaps its their way of expressing how much they miss me when I leave. I honestly don't know...really. But the only thing I do know for sure is that I will miss my schoolmates as much as they will miss me.
A few days ago after school at the canteen when I asked Hin Kai if he saw miao, he replied by blasting relatively loudly in my ear, proclaiming "I know you go IP already lah! You good lah! See I never even get in..." I stared at him, lost for a second. What the damn hell has IP got to relate with finding Mu Yao? I mean...that was a completely irrelevant and uncalled for answer. Or should I say remark?
However, I do sympathize with him too. I fully understand and comprehend the "dejected" feeling. It affects one's self-confidence and morale. That I realise, and more. The utter disappointment upon knowing that one was not selected for IP after all the trouble of begging teachers for CCA records, filling up the long application form and writing a personal essay is perfectly normal, and natural. It's not an easy fact to accept either, especially after sitting through the tough admission test and paying an extravagent 50 bucks for the surprisingly shockingly easy General Ability Test (GAT). So Hin Kai, if you still feel so bad about this IP saga, go ahead and cry. And if you think that I'm fortunate to get into VIP, go ahead and admire me.
*oops* What the hell did I just say?
Lol. Personally, I did not expect myself to be accepted into the programme, let alone pass the damn "chim" admission test. Really. I did not expect myself to be selected. Really. Honestly. So it was truly a very pleasant surprise when I received an sms one Sunday morning congratulating me on my successful application to VIP.
Ok I've strayed off topic...
Back to the recent exams...today was the verification of marks for all subjects. Now let me announce (humbly) that I have, once again, for the second time in this year, clinched the third place for overall class position. (Do I hear applauses? )
Ok so I have done well, in comparison to the class standard.
In comparison to my own very high standards, I have done so so damn freaking badly. The number of careless mistakes I made is more than the number of hair strands I have.
Mind you, I'm not bald or botak.
For the record, the time now is 4: 11 pm and 28 seconds. Guess what, I'm still in school.
To be exact, the AEP media lab. The heaven filled with power macs. The heaven where you can surf almost anything you want in the comfort of air-con. (I don't know about porn...) But above all, the heaven where ONLY, I repeat myself, ONLY, AEP students have the privilege to indulge and enjoy in.
I think this is the first time in my life too that I'm blogging on a mac. And if I'm not wrong, this is my longest post ever.
But I'm about to leave soon for home, now that the heavy downpour has ceased. Finally the sky decided to stop peeing. Finally the sky decided to brighten up. Finally, I've finished my longest post so far. Finally, I'm going home.
Finally, that's all for now.
Scream Out Loud!
Ian
But with the end of it comes the start of something equally bad, if not worse.
It's none other than the terrifying results. Yup, that's another fear altogether. Trauma to be exact.
Though we all know that nothing can be done to the results as the exams are over, there's still this natural fear and anxiety inside us that constantly reminds us that the worst is yet to come. I try very hard not to think of the results that will haunt me but somehow I just cannot accomplish that. Everytime someone starts talking about my recent exams, this horrifying thought of me not performing up to standard penetrates my mind, and pokes itself so deeply that it causes me endless worries, leaving me questioning in vain what the hell would happen if I did badly.
Well...perhaps Ms Lim would comment on my report card writing: "Ian has slackened tremendously this term and he needs to buck up on his studies. "
Perhaps my grandparents would nod their head in dismay saying: "Ian, how come do so badly? Last time your papa exam that time will lock himself up in his room and study all day...he always get good results one...always top three in standard. How about you? Whole day play play play never study see lah now results so poor..."
Perhaps my parents would disappointingly remark: "Ai yoh what happen to your studies?! See lah...always so careless...later you don't do well VIP will reject you..."
Perhaps, perhaps, perhaphs. Maybe things will turn out like this. Or maybe not?
Or will my ever-understanding, caring and loving classmates (people like Andrew, Wei Liang, Mu Yao and so on) comfort me and assure me that I did rather well? Actually, as a matter of fact, they did.
Andrew said that I would not do so badly. Oh well I suppose he came to that conclusion just because I have been grabbing the first or third position in class from sec 1 to now. (For the record, I got 1st in class for sec 1 SA1 and SA2, and 3rd in class for sec 2 SA1. )
Ok ok I know what you are going to comment next: This stupid idoitic Ian has a damn freaking big ego leh...I know he clever lah, but don't need to hao lian (be proud in Chinese) and show off right?!
Relax friend, I'm not being a proud asshole or anything but it's just to prove that I have degraded from the first in sec 1 to third in sec 2. That's a bad thing. (Actually it's partly thanks to the cur who joined us this year and is supposedly smarter than me. )
Above all these burdens there's this constant "reminder" by my dear darling friends that I'm leaving for VJ next year. Maybe the word "reminder" is a big understatement. Neither can I call those "pleasant" comments jeers.
Perhaps its their way of expressing how much they miss me when I leave. I honestly don't know...really. But the only thing I do know for sure is that I will miss my schoolmates as much as they will miss me.
A few days ago after school at the canteen when I asked Hin Kai if he saw miao, he replied by blasting relatively loudly in my ear, proclaiming "I know you go IP already lah! You good lah! See I never even get in..." I stared at him, lost for a second. What the damn hell has IP got to relate with finding Mu Yao? I mean...that was a completely irrelevant and uncalled for answer. Or should I say remark?
However, I do sympathize with him too. I fully understand and comprehend the "dejected" feeling. It affects one's self-confidence and morale. That I realise, and more. The utter disappointment upon knowing that one was not selected for IP after all the trouble of begging teachers for CCA records, filling up the long application form and writing a personal essay is perfectly normal, and natural. It's not an easy fact to accept either, especially after sitting through the tough admission test and paying an extravagent 50 bucks for the surprisingly shockingly easy General Ability Test (GAT). So Hin Kai, if you still feel so bad about this IP saga, go ahead and cry. And if you think that I'm fortunate to get into VIP, go ahead and admire me.
*oops* What the hell did I just say?
Lol. Personally, I did not expect myself to be accepted into the programme, let alone pass the damn "chim" admission test. Really. I did not expect myself to be selected. Really. Honestly. So it was truly a very pleasant surprise when I received an sms one Sunday morning congratulating me on my successful application to VIP.
Ok I've strayed off topic...
Back to the recent exams...today was the verification of marks for all subjects. Now let me announce (humbly) that I have, once again, for the second time in this year, clinched the third place for overall class position. (Do I hear applauses? )
Ok so I have done well, in comparison to the class standard.
In comparison to my own very high standards, I have done so so damn freaking badly. The number of careless mistakes I made is more than the number of hair strands I have.
Mind you, I'm not bald or botak.
For the record, the time now is 4: 11 pm and 28 seconds. Guess what, I'm still in school.
To be exact, the AEP media lab. The heaven filled with power macs. The heaven where you can surf almost anything you want in the comfort of air-con. (I don't know about porn...) But above all, the heaven where ONLY, I repeat myself, ONLY, AEP students have the privilege to indulge and enjoy in.
I think this is the first time in my life too that I'm blogging on a mac. And if I'm not wrong, this is my longest post ever.
But I'm about to leave soon for home, now that the heavy downpour has ceased. Finally the sky decided to stop peeing. Finally the sky decided to brighten up. Finally, I've finished my longest post so far. Finally, I'm going home.
Finally, that's all for now.
Scream Out Loud!
Ian
Monday, October 10, 2005
Sorry
SORRY!!!!!
I know it has been ages since my last post but...
I'm studying for my damn freaking end-of-year exams!
Today was history paper....and many questions came from our history workbook! Thank goodness I did them all...so today's paper was quite a breeze except that I did not have enough time for source-based questions!
Damn.
Notice that my posts keeps getting shorter and shorter and shorter...
But I promise you (my readers out there...if I have any) that after my exams on next Monday it will get longer and longer and longer and longer and longer....
Ok I need to go bury myself in books again. Thats all for now.
Ian
I know it has been ages since my last post but...
I'm studying for my damn freaking end-of-year exams!
Today was history paper....and many questions came from our history workbook! Thank goodness I did them all...so today's paper was quite a breeze except that I did not have enough time for source-based questions!
Damn.
Notice that my posts keeps getting shorter and shorter and shorter...
But I promise you (my readers out there...if I have any) that after my exams on next Monday it will get longer and longer and longer and longer and longer....
Ok I need to go bury myself in books again. Thats all for now.
Ian
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